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At work today, they were playing Lady Gaga on the loudspeakers. I said I liked her. My coworker threatened to vomit. Is Papparazzi really that bad? If so, I'm not cleaning it up. I'm dumbemployed.

by anonymous on 09/30/14 at 6:20pm - Yep, you're Dumbemployed (2) Permalink
Filed Under: Weird Shift ( lady gaga vomit papparazzi )

At work today, I was subjected to a two hour training session. I wouldn't mind, but I've been working at this big box store for a decade already. I'm dumbemployed.

by anonymous on 09/30/14 at 3:11pm - Yep, you're Dumbemployed (3) Permalink
Filed Under: Overtime ( training big box decade )

At work today, I shared my lunch with a coworker. He was pretty happy, so I felt good. Then he tapped me on the shoulder. "So, what are you bringing me tomorrow?" Uh oh. I started a terrible tradition. I'm dumbemployed.

by anonymous on 09/30/14 at 12:52pm - Yep, you're Dumbemployed (3) Permalink
Filed Under: Overtime ( tomorrow tradition lunch )

At work today, I won one of those raffles where you put your business card in a fishbowl. I told a coworker- he claimed that the prize, a catered meal, was company property since I used a company business card. He was serious. And I think I'll actually have to do it. I'm dumbemployed.

by anonymous on 09/30/14 at 8:33am - Yep, you're Dumbemployed (4) Permalink
Filed Under: Just Dumb ( raffle fishbowl business cards )

At work today, I was hoping to do my laundry before work. Laundry machine = broken. That's why, as I type this, I'm wearing parachute pants and a polka dot blouse. I'm dumbemployed.

by anonymous on 09/29/14 at 9:04pm - Yep, you're Dumbemployed (4) Permalink
Filed Under: Just Dumb ( laundry parachute pants polka dot blouse )

At work today, a few people were protesting outside our building because of "bailout money." They wanted the bank next door. We sell electronics. I'm dumbemployed.

by anonymous on 09/29/14 at 6:20pm - Yep, you're Dumbemployed (4) Permalink
Filed Under: Customers ( bailout money bank electronics )

At work today, I saw a patient at the end of my shift. Typical hypochondriac. It's funny- people don't feel qualified to fix their plumbing. But give them Web MD, and they can cure their own cancer. Hint: You can't. I'm dumbemployed.

by anonymous on 09/29/14 at 3:11pm - Yep, you're Dumbemployed (5) Permalink
Filed Under: Customers ( hypochondriac web md cancer )

At work today, the people in my office found out my secret- I got a 1600 on my SATs. My supervisor came up to me and said he was surprised. "I would have guessed 800 at best." Thanks, boss. I'm dumbemployed.

by anonymous on 09/29/14 at 12:52pm - Yep, you're Dumbemployed (7) Permalink
Filed Under: Bosses ( 1600 sats 800 )

At work today, my boss collided with me over the coffee creamer. His solution? Shoving me in the shoulder and taking it. I would complain- but I would have done the same if I were him. I'm dumbemployed.

by anonymous on 09/29/14 at 8:33am - Yep, you're Dumbemployed (4) Permalink
Filed Under: Bosses ( coffee creamer shoving )

At work today, I was extra careful to jump over a large puddle so I didn't get my work pants wet. I wasn't careful to avoid the puddle I inadvertently jumped into. My coworker asked if I'd been fly fishing. I'm dumbemployed.

by namethaticon on 09/28/14 at 9:04pm - Yep, you're Dumbemployed (10) Permalink
Filed Under: Weird Shift ( pants wet fly fishing )

At work today, my boss - who had just returned from a week out of the country - discovered something: the employee he put in charge while he was away deposited all of the week's deposits into an old, closed account. Now he can't make payroll for another week. I'm dumbemployed.

by anonymous on 09/28/14 at 6:20pm - Yep, you're Dumbemployed (9) Permalink
Filed Under: Bosses ( payroll deposits bank account )

At work today, I left my Tupperware in the fridge. When I got back, someone else's initials were scrawled on in Sharpie. You can't just pirate Tupperware! I'm dumbemployed.

by anonymous on 09/28/14 at 3:11pm - Yep, you're Dumbemployed (5) Permalink
Filed Under: Weird Shift ( tupperware fridge pirate )
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