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At work today, I overheard my boss talking about his "band." It's really him, an acoustic guitar, and a copy of GarageBand. His only accompaniment is loneliness. I'm dumbemployed.

by anonymous on 07/29/16 at 6:20pm - Yep, you're Dumbemployed (3) Permalink
Filed Under: Bosses ( band garage band guitar )

At work today, my ID card wasn't working and I couldn't get past the security door. I gave it to the guard. He said that I'd demagnetized it. I asked with what. He said that my keys could have done it. Something tells me he didn't get an A in science class. I'm dumbemployed.

by anonymous on 07/29/16 at 3:11pm - Yep, you're Dumbemployed (8) Permalink
Filed Under: Weird Shift ( id card security door magnets )

At work today, I showered in the locker room (we work in a hospital). When I got out, I realized that I hadn't brought any towels. And the ones that were supposed to be stocked were gone. Have you ever walked around in wet scrubs? Don't. I'm dumbemployed.

by anonymous on 07/29/16 at 12:52pm - Yep, you're Dumbemployed (1) Permalink
Filed Under: Overtime ( showered locker room scrubs )

At work today, I texted my girlfriend to meet me outside our store in 20 minutes. That's when my coworker decided to tell me about his civil war reenactment that weekend. Now I'm on the verge of being dumped. I'm dumbemployed.

by oakwoodsavage00 on 07/29/16 at 8:33am - Yep, you're Dumbemployed (2) Permalink
Filed Under: Overtime ( text civil war story )

At work today, three unwashed mugs were in the sink. I did my part and started washing them. I proceeded to get yelled at for "meddling" with other people's stuff. I'm dumbemployed.

by anonymous on 07/28/16 at 6:20pm - Yep, you're Dumbemployed (5) Permalink
Filed Under: Just Dumb ( mugs unwashed meddling )

At work today, I had a political argument with my coworker. She was shouting that we had to increase troop levels in a foreign country. She called that county "Afghaniraq." I'm dumbemployed.

by anonymous on 07/28/16 at 3:11pm - Yep, you're Dumbemployed (10) Permalink
Filed Under: Just Dumb ( argument politics afghaniraq )

At work today, I was helping a younger customer choose "his" new car. His parents are paying, of course. That didn't stop him from bargaining until my margins were almost non-existent. I'm dumbemployed.

by anonymous on 07/28/16 at 12:52pm - Yep, you're Dumbemployed (3) Permalink
Filed Under: Customers ( younger car bargain )

At work today, we conducted a poll that everyone spent all day on. Customers were ignored. Sales languished. The poll? Cupcakes or Pie- which is better? (By the way, cupcakes won). I'm dumbemployed.

by anonymous on 07/28/16 at 8:33am - Yep, you're Dumbemployed (11) Permalink
Filed Under: Customers ( cupcakes pie sales )

At work today, my boss smelled a little spicy. Later, I found out he's going on a date. The problem is that the spice he smelled like was cumin. I'm dumbemployed.

by anonymous on 07/27/16 at 6:20pm - Yep, you're Dumbemployed (6) Permalink
Filed Under: Bosses ( spices smell cumin )

At work today, my boss called me into his office. "Sit down," he said. I waited, and he tapped his desk. "Well, aren't you going to say somethign?" I didn't know what to say. "The new chair!" he shouted. "It's comfy, isn't it?" Thanks for that nerveracking meeting, sir. I'm dumbemployed.

by anonymous on 07/27/16 at 3:11pm - Yep, you're Dumbemployed (22) Permalink
Filed Under: Bosses ( nervous chair comfy )

At work today, I tried loading a PDF onto my computer, but it wouldn't load. I drummed my hands on my desk as I waited- and the desk quickly came crashing down onto my bare feet. I'm dumbemployed.

by anonymous on 07/27/16 at 12:52pm - Yep, you're Dumbemployed (12) Permalink
Filed Under: Weird Shift ( pdf desk feet )

At work today, we were stocking milk bags (big bags of milk that restaurants use). I shouldn't have been wearing a sharp belt buckle. My pants were quickly drenched in milk. I'm dumbemployed.

by anonymous on 07/27/16 at 8:33am - Yep, you're Dumbemployed (6) Permalink
Filed Under: Weird Shift ( milk bags milk pants )
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